Thursday, March 16, 2006

EnnyPen 101 - Week Four

Update on the hot topic from last week: friendboy polls lower, friend girl polls higher. Luckily, she seemed to take on some of the gr3@t advice from last week and gave me 'I hope we have the proper tutor this week' intro to encourage more chat. SCORE! So whilst chatting to her about how frickin delusional economics is, I manged to drop in 'my Dad, my boyfriend and my accountant friend have all done it and hate it' for the benefit of friendboy, so that's cleared too, tho judging from this week there's nothing to worry about (Kthx Stoody-stu-stu and Erica!)

In other news, I almost died in a tragic car accident ths morning (calm down folks - the only injury was the ears of the angels as I unleashed a holy torrent of swearwords), so I thought I should release a 3 part public notice so that the masses can learn from the incident and prevent it from happening to any other poor innocent souls:

INTERNATIONAL STUDENTS: Do NOT stand in the middle of the road at the traffic lights where there is a perfectly fine walking man who is CLEARLY blinking red and the rush hour traffic stresses ppl out about finding you sucked up in the vent on the car that makes the turbo work, hence leading the line of their vision to the left instead of out the front windscreen in already sh!tty weather.

ACTION BUSSES: Please move the school busstop that is near the uni to be a little further past said traffice lights.

B!TCH MUMS IN 4WDs: Do NOT under ANY circumstance SLAM ON YOUR BRAKES as said ACTION bus indicates it is moving on so that you can CUT IN BEHIND THE BUS to get to stodgy school, while the poor soul in the car behind you is busy dodging said international students posing vapidly in the middle of rush traffic.

International students + ACTION busses + B!TCH MUMS IN 4WDs = (screeching, grinding and shuddering brakes from Ennys HOTT car) + (screeching, grinding and shuddering EnnyPen) + (Panoramic shots of churhbells ringing and birds fleeing trees as unholy verse spews forth from Ennys dainty (and not at all Bill Murray like) lips).


tokenwoman said...

Scares like that are never good... Hope you are nice and calm and all swear worded out :)

ChickyBabe said...

Good to hear you're ok!

Erica said...

I H8 B!tch mums in 4WDs. H8 em. Driving all fast with 10 kids in the back fighting over the automatic windows, trying to get around the other bitch mums in 4WDs parked illegally on both sides of every road surrounding a school...

I'm very glad you are OK though - It sounds like there are some traffic problems near your Uni. You should write a letter to someone.

Enny said...

TW - I managed to calm down, but then nearly murdered a the car mechanic that afternoon when my window would go back up AGAIN! It went a lil sum'n like this:

Enny: My window won't wind up
DH: Bring ur car down now
Enny: Now or tmr?
DH: Now
*Enny brings car down*
*Enny gets yelled at by a diff DF for parking her car with window stuck open near the building for 'security'*
*Office DH ignores Enny for 5 minutes*
*DH takes keys and says 'we'll call'*
*Enny walk halfway round the block before realising he has all her keys including housekeys and that she is stuck with no way of getting home*
Enny: Will you have this fixed today?
DH: Dunno, we're busy
Enny: So shall I just bring it back tmr?
DH: Yeah

CB - Thanks for your concern - sleep tight!

Erica - As if it's not bad enough that you can't see round them at the million Canberra roundabouts - they hafta force u to have near death experience! I gotta track down her numberplate and write her a letter... ;o)