Grown up adult whinge

I'm so totally not prepared enough for this election.

Adam has touched on this a bit, and I do think I'm a bit of a product of my environment. My parents vote Labor, so I'm predisposed to voting Labor. But I don't really know why... I DO know that I disagree with us being involved in the war, I disagree with the manner in which immigration and indigenous Australians have been 'managed', and although I felt a little bit sorry for him during the debate, I don't think I really trust the man to run the country.

On a note closer to home, there has long been rumor hanging over our heads that the existing government pretty wants to be rid of the area I work in. And although it sucks for me, I can understand. When it comes down to it, the money you pay in tax goes to paying my salary. And the more of me there are, the less your money goes toward good and important things. And the more inefficient the people and the processes are, the more right you have to be p!ssed off at the manner in which things are being run.

We found out this morning that this is just as likely, if not more, to occur under a Labor government - damned if you do, damned if you don't I guess. But, it's not going to make me all of a sudden vote Liberal to hedge my bets.

Is ANYONE aware of an easy/simple way for me to find out what I would be voting for, depending on who I vote for? I've heard rumour that Greens and/or Democrats were against tax cuts, instead planning to use the money for hospitals and education. Doesn't that make sense?! How do I get that to happen?!

Any help would be much appreciated - I really would hate to stuff up my chance this year.

PS - How on earth is negative gearing allowed?! From my understanding: if you get greedy and buy a house to rent it out, whilst paying rent at another place, the government covers the difference between what the renter is paying you and what your mortgage is. No wonder it's so hard to find frickin' housing!

Wedding Fest - festivities and festers

We had a total wedding fest this weekend - one yesterday, one this morning and a wedding rehearsal for the wedding we are attending next weekend.

They were all slightly different - yesterdays was held in the Rose Garden at Old Parliament House, a civil celebrant running through the ceremony in what couldn't have been more than fifteen minutes; this mornings was held in a Chapel type thing in Gunghalin, a modern building without a crucifix and presided over by a man who kept it light hearted, adding his own jokes as he went along; the practice was held in a park, in preparation for the ceremony to be held in the Blue Mountains - I'm unsure what to expect.

Yesterdays wedding was lovely, the cake collapsing whilst everyone awaited the bridal party was a bit of an exclamation point. The couple have been together since 2000, I went to school with the groom, but was never particularly close to him. This wasn't helped when he exclaimed quite publicly that The Hun had traded down by taking up with me, after he broke up with his ex almost six months earlier - luckily for him he mellowed out and is actually quite a nice guy - his drawl a fair indicator of his easygoing personality. So of course it was no real surprise when he proposed to his gf - I'd only ever really known them together - and it was fantastic to be part of the relatively small celebration.

This morning was slightly different - I met the groom through my ex - he was the guy who dated the ex's first girlfriend (as mentioned here). I remember the first time we met her, many years ago at a 21st and how well they clicked together, how she was such a nice change from the girl who'd dated more than half of the good friends and how easy going, friendly and funny she was.

But during the vows they repeated this morning I realised - they're married. They are actually getting married, having planned together to get married, having decided that yes she would marry him. For all the weddings I've been attending over the past however long, this was the first time that it really struck me - when really, it should have been no less or no more a surprise than any other.

How long have I pictured a wedding as something to do?

How long have I in my mind thought of it as a natural progression, rather than a willful decision to spend the rest of your life with someone? To resist the urge to walk out rather than stick it out? To speak rather than hold silence? To actually forgive and actually forget? To forever be tied to someone, to love them even when you're angry, to not want them to ever change? To be completely, entirely and utterly open and honest?

Is this what I feel?

Is this felt for me?

For all my thought of what I would do, how much have I taken into consideration what would be best for us? Not for me, not for him, not for my parents or his family or our friends?

And for all my nagging and my episodes I've experience in the last however long, I realise that me biting me tongue really is the best thing for it. It's not something I need to think about right now. It's not something that should be thought be thought about right now.

And it's the first time I've been comfortable with that.

Shocking, Shockinger and Shockingest

Shocking - I have a blood test tmr at 8am that requires 12 hours fasting - so I just had to finish cramming some dinner rolls and a cruiser in my yam. I was five minutes late. I have the terrible feeling that my last few days of shocking study eating is going to make my glucose tests abnormal.

Shockinger - I had an exam tonight where we'd been given five topics to study of which four would be on the exam, of which we had to write essays about two. The one topic I told my study budy that I was sure would not be on the exam, was. Shockinger - the one topic I had the most "studying" done fore was not even mentioned.

Shockingest - part of my procrastination/study involved perousing people's facebooks for videos to look at. The girl who sold me my car had a video snap that was sent to her, showing two scantily clad women doing tequila shots. Figuring it was going to turn into a skit mocking porn, I loaded it up and sat through the first two of the total five minutes. I was wrong. It was lesbian porn. I have no idea why that shocked me so much - I guess it's BOUND to happen that people will use it for porn, but still - shockingest discovery of the day!

Dress me up - SOME MORE

I mentioned here that I'd bought another dress - because you were so helpful with the last one, I was wondering if people had ideas for this one?

The dress is hanging from The Hun's bookshelf, so please - no scrutinizing the contents. I love my boys nerdy :o)

(Although, I don't mind if you bag out the cushion - I think it's from when he was a baby - it is the complete mixture of ugly and adorable.)

Enny! Don't be a hero!

From one recycled toilet paper user to another...

Next time it feels like your stomach is being burnt while eating a slap-up home-made Sambal-Oelak-Chilli -Tofu curry, DON'T KEEP EATING IT.

Hrm

Mumsy: "Middle bro tells us you have a blog. I googled (real name) blog but couldn't find it - where is it?"

Enny: "I'm not telling you!"

Mumsy: "Well, I'm sure middle bro will tell us."

Hrm.

Catchy imaginative title indicating dot points

Shall I fill you in on the past week or so? Yes, yes I shall.

• Did you realise it's almost exam time? I have one next Thursday and one the Thursday after. This does not excite nor soothe me. Damn you, uni.
  

• Our little running club is going well - there are now four of us, as middle bro has invited another of his friends. The fact that this friend was able to just slip right into the second session of the second week with barely a puff was a lil sad-making - we still struggle our way through and puff and sweat a lot, whilst the new guy was bounding along like a gangly legged puppy doing hurdles. Nice guy though.

• To assist in this new found "love" of running, I'm headed out to buy some proper runners today (as opposed to the indoor circuit shoes I bought off the hot salesman last year) to stop my ankles from panging and to hopefully give me a bit more bounce.

• This crazy haze of exercise has engulfed me somewhat, and I'm planning on picking up mumsy's bike from her house today as my black beast of a Huffy apparently retired it's way into the skip many moons ago. This is as a direct result of being sent an entry form to the Tour de Femme and thinking it was a good idea for me and my old boss to enter. I also think that the 'Pedal for Pap' idea is amusing and very important - ladies, please, make sure you're paying your doctor an obscene amount to violate you every two years!

• Another reason for picking up the bike is that there is rumoured construction at my work next year that will take over the carpark, meaning less parking for everyone and an increased likeliness that I will no longer be able to find a free carpark and there is NO WAY I AM PAYING. It doesn't help that the public transport system is so terrible in Canberra - $22.00 for 10 rides, or $3 a ride without a prepurchased ticket?! Unlikely. So me and my boss before my other older boss are considering riding a few times a week - she doesn't want to ride along and I'd like someone to share my pain with me. We shall see how this pans out.

• I am forever indebted to eldest bro's gf for pointing out that there's an Australian Womens Health magazine. Some of you might remember from way back when that The Hun bought me an American subscription for my birthday a few years ago which was pretty good, except it was always in the opposite season and all the prices, places and products were American. I have only skimmed through this one at work and it's looking pretty good!

• I've almost finished the second last Harry Potter and I have to say it's the one I've been the least into. I don't know if it's because I haven't seen it as the movie and that makes me uncomfortable, but I realised last night that there's been a whole lot of faffing about with not a whole lot happening - Harry has a stoopid book, Hermione wasn't talking to Ron, where's Draco, shrivelled hand, Slughorn's a sad old man, blah blah blah. But I got to the bit that I think signals the exciting finish as of this morning, so it still has time to redeem itself.

• Some of you might be aware that I have scheduled myself a visit to Queensland that hopefully won't fall through this time. Rinpoche has rescheduled a visit over the weekend of the 23rd and 24th of February so it seems that myself and somewhere between 1 and 5 16 - 24 year old boys will be descending upon Brisbane and the Sunshine coast. At this stage we're planning to fly into Brisbane on Thursday 21st February where I plan to have dinner with some lovely people, drive almost 2 hours up the coast on the Friday, spend the weekend meditating and doing some training, then returning to Brisbane on the Tuesday for our flight home. I'm so excited about this. Not only the holiday but really getting somewhere with my spirituality - I can't wait to see where it takes me.

• I bought some earring and a bangle and black headband and a black pair of little peepy toes and another dress to get me through this weddding season - there are now three in two weekends. I will do my best for suitable pics.
  

• I think that's about it for now - I'm sure there'll be plenty more as I've got procrastination study out the wazoo over the next two weeks or so!
  

Peace out, ladies and gents.

Of lines and lanes

She pulled out of the driveway a little faster than necessary. She knew she was just working herself up, letting something small become something big, become her only focus. It happened from time to time, but had started happening more and more often of late. She thought she knew why, but also had no idea. Did she really want a moment of clarity? Was it inevitable? Or was it always destined to be out of reach?

She slowed at the roundabout, watching the cabined ute with the large screen tv in the tray, held in place by a grey tarpaulin. The girl in the back seat had her glasses pressed up against the glass, eyes down toward the road as the vehicle made it's right hand turn.

She fell in place behind the ute, her mind still heavy with thought, mulling and and pondering, grimacing and pouting. The ute flicked its indicator on and moved to the left edge of the road, brake lights at her eye level. Her mind flicked back to many years ago to when her mother was
explaining the courtesy of truck drivers - on single lane roads when the other lane was clear, they'd move over and indicate to let others passShe shifted down a gear, stepped on the accelerator and sped past the ute with a wave.

She looked back in the rearview mirror and saw the ute driver gesturing. She looked back in the rearview mirror and saw the ute slowly mounting the curb. She looked back in the rearview mirror and saw the double lines on the road.

He had not intended for her to pass.

She had not checked for oncoming traffic.

As she slowed down at the next roundabout she realised that the cloud of anger and hopelessness she had felt as she left the house may well have been her last.

Was it a sign that she should realise how lucky she really was? How happy she really was? How she was only pulling herself down into depression?

Or was it a sign that it was meant to happen. That she had given everything her best shot and it was time to chuck it all in. That this was one thing she could achieve, alone.

Angus & Julia Stone - UC 13th October

After seeing them perform at the Big Day Out earlier this year and buying all of their EPs and their new album, I was really looking forward to seeing Angus & Julia Stone.

The line into the UC bar went right back near to where the hoppers were when we rocked up there at about quarter past 8 - doors opened at 8. Every person who bought a ticket was required to show their ID, plus it seems that a lot of people ordered tickets through Moshtix - meaning they had to swipe their moshtix/credit card as well. The advantage to it taking so long to get in is that while we were getting ID'd Angus & Julia were making their way to 'backstage'. Two things were evident - 1) They're both tiny; 2) Angus STILL has not cut his hair/beard. Very distressing.

We'd had a drink or two before we got there (more on THAT later) and so lined up for a drink. The story is that the Green Room used to be located somewhere else, but has now shifted to the UC Bar. Green Room: GET SOME MORE BAR STAFF. We waited 25 minutes to be served by one of the three bar staff (a fourth appeared jus before we got to the front of the line) and hey had no bottled water and no cruisers. So I bought two double vodka with coke premixes and a cup of water.

The support act was Orange Bird (who for some reason I can't find the MySpace page for) and they were all right - they looked pretty metal with long hair and flannies, but they did some soundscapey type stuffm some work with a big drum and some gongs and a crazy girl with a headband over on the left. I do recall the drummer being pretty damn awesome though.

Angus & Julia Stone came on at about 10pm, just as a couple of tall guys and some short girls walked past with the good ol' 'excuse me' and stood right. in. front. of me. Damn I hate that. As a result, I spent a good part of the show staring at the zit on the back of the guys neck and trying to get a glimpse between the heads of middle bro and youngest bro who were standing a few 'rows' ahead of us. So I didn't really get to see that much (each glimpse of Angus as a hairy monkey didn't really help much either). Most of the songs they performed were off the new album - for those of you playing at home, I think they played the following (not in order):

- The Beast
- Wasted
- Just a Boy
- Hollywood
- A Book Like This
- Soldier
- Another Day
- Mango Tree
- Paper Aeroplane
- Private Lawns
- Tubthumphing
- An untitled track

I think I'm missing some, so will check with the bro's and get back to you. I'm glad they did Paper Aeroplane as it was my first and favourite track of theirs; Tubthumping was played while we were in line for the bar so didn't really hear it (though The Hun's sister said she hated it) and the untitled track was a beautiful song they've written for a friend getting married that I do hope they release.

I do wish they'd done 'Sadder than You', 'What You Wanted' and 'All of Me' - Julia has a fantastic voice and she did a fantastic job of 'What You Wanted' at BDO - very piercing. I also wish Angus spoke up a bit more when he talked as he was a mumbler, and there were a lot people talking all the way through! Not to mention zit-neck guy in front of me; and the couple that decided to stand next to us and sway, bumping me and The Hun and my handbag each time - I had to release my elbows to my hips so they could 'enjoy' it as much as we did. Overall, I ranked the night a 9/10 (points off for not eating enough before going, making me a bit sulky when The Hun told me to shut up when I called out to middle bro to move his head to the right), middle bro ranked it a 10/10, as did one of our friends who hadn't heard much of them before but decided to come along after hearing some of the music on their houseboat weekend (even though I'd emailed everyone two months earlier telling them the must go!).

We were also stopped by one of the band members (the guy in the red bucket hat) on our way out, asked to sign the mailing list (that I had already done) and asked what we were up to now. Our sad result, being Canberra, was that we were heading home (after somone pulled the shifty and asked him where THEY would be going). I'm just that sad that I don't know good places to go hang out with awesome bands!

The final 'highlight' of the night was returning to the food van that I last visited about 5 years ago. I have a friend who lives in Chifley, and each time we went out to civic (ie, once or twice a week) we'd stop at Marty's food van - at that stage located in the servo on the main road. I would typically order a steak burger with just lettuce and bacon (no sauce) or hot chips (no gravy), and always one of those dirty foodvan dimsims. So I was a bit shocked when I went up to order for middle bro (my shout for him driving) and marty replied with 'and a dimsim?!'. I had to explain that I was vegan now (hence why I couldn't get my usual chips fried in the oil with nuggets and scallops) so I wouldn't need one. 5 years is a long time between orders!

Final word - if you haven't heard them after all this time of me raving about them, PLEASE at least check out their MySpace or look them up in YouTube or here and have a listen to one of my top five bands of all time.

One of the rare moments it doesn't actually suck to be at uni!

The essay I was writing here - 75%.

The speech I wanted to walk out of the other week - 16/20.

I'm sitting on 46/60 for this unit now, with the 40% exam on the 25th of October. The exam where you write two essays from four possible topics - he gave us an outline of five potential questions, meaning all should be good in the world.

Props to you, uni, much props indeed.

And it only took me until 2:45am

I was in the middle of whinging to Mick that should be someone we could complain to about the TOTALLY RATSH!T manner in which the BDO site operated from midnight last night. Heaven knows how many times I entered my personal details and my credit card details, how many times I hit F5, how many times I swore at the 'too many tickets ordered' message or cursed the manner in which it asked me to verify a code WITHOUT SHOWING ME A CODE. Or the time it told me it would show confirmation in two minutes, and I started at the blank screen for over 25 minutes until it eventually just timed out.

People were dropping like flies - The Hun hit the pillow at 12:30 (once it got to 12:15 and I didn't have tickets yet, he realised he wasn't really all that keen and didn't mind if we missed out), eldest bro's gf passed out at about 1:30 and eldest bro took over the shift, and youngest bro gave up at around the same time. Middle bro secured his tickets at around 2am (I read of ppl on forums who had managed to get some at around 12:30 and were still complaining!) and I FINALLY got mine almost 3 hours after I first tried, with Mick the same soon after. I'd called a lady at work to let her know that they were on at midnight - she was trying to get tickets for her son - she gave up at around 2am and did the same as youngest bro, attempting to buy the tickets through Ticketmaster. Luckily she and youngest bro made it - apparently all tickets were sold out by 9:22am (they went on sale at 9am).

Big thanks to Mick who kept ME awake, ensuring that I didn't give up in one of my many mini-tanties I experienced during the dark hours of early morning - could you imagine sitting up past 2:30am and then giving up?! We only just got tickets last year when we didn't realise they went on sale at midnight (I was luckily at my parents house at 6:30am for martial arts camp and my bro's reminded me) so there was no chance I was going to miss out on Bjork!

Anyone else going?

I'm fit, I'm fit and don't you know it

A group of us at work did a bootcamp last month, twice a week at lunch times. It was good fun and my fitness did improve - I managed more laps, pushups, dips, squats and a (slightly) longer plank in the final session - but we worked it out to cost us $12.50 each per session... and there wasn't really anything in there that we couldn't have done ourselves...

Can you see where this is going?

My current boss (I've been in the same team for almost 5 years yet I always seems to be changing bosses) decided that we should hold our own sessions, focusing on the boxing as it was the session everyone enjoyed the most and we both go to cardioboxing classes on Tuesday nights. He sent an email out to the group (most of them from our division at work) to tell them we'd start running our own session. The next week he got a few emails from people outside of the division inquiring about the kickboxing classes we were running - it all got a bit wtf right then, what with the fact I'd also been tasked with running the first class (ie, if ppl hate it, no one will come back). That class is tomorrow.

The introduction relates to two different streams of thought now.

One - My fitness. Middle bro and I have decided to the couch to 5k challenge - apparantly, at the end of 8 weeks, middle bro and I (and one of his good friends) will be able to run 5k. Non stop. That's almost running around Lake Tuggeranong. How exciting!! A big part of this has been I've realised that I will always have difficulty 'managing' what I eat, in terms of fad diets or eating plans. So, I'm trying something slightly different (tho still having the shakes for breakfast and a shake and salad for lunch) and getting myself into exercise I enjoy. Worrying less about what's going in, and more about what I'm doing to get it off. I'll let you know how THAT works for me.

Tw0 - Rebel Sport. For our once a week fitness class I had to purchase some punching gloves and pads, so have been looking around for fingerless non-leather mitts (I hate the ones where your fingers are covered). I looked everywhere and had pretty much exhausted all options, so gave Woden Rebel Sport a call. I was on hold for 10 minutes (I watched the timer on the phone as the hold music got more, More, MORE annoying) before I hung up and called back again. When I finally got someone to answer, he told me that yes they do have fingerless gloves in vinyl. When I asked what prise they were, he told me they had a whole range, from $20 - $60 dollars.

I left work early (no mean feat as I am in negative flex due to having to take 2 hour lunches twice a week for bootcamp) and headed over there. Suprise suprise, only two pairs of fingerless gloves. Of those, only one didn't state them as leather, so they told me they weren't leather. They had no non-leather mits either, so I have to duck over tomorrow and pick myself up some non leather pads from A-mart sport.

I found the tag during cardioboxing class tonight - my gloves are made of leather. And (very obviously) used, hence non refundable.

I just cannot believe that they person on the phone (when it was FINALLY answered) would outright lie out of laziness. I will NEVER buy anything from Woden Rebel Sport again and you best believe I'll be telling everyone I know too.

Methinks I need to get to that lunchtime class and get my endorphins up again...!

Welaxing Weekend

I had a lovely weekend with no uni work hanging over my head - I do need to write 300 words wrapping up the terrible presentation we ran on Thursday, but that's not due until this Thursday.

The Hun headed off to Neligen for a friends bucks weekend - five boys on a houseboat for two nights. I had to laugh when my sweet boy indicated he was looking forward to a quiet weekend where he could just lay about and read - I'm looking forward to his getting home to tell me what ACTUALLY happened!

Friday night gf1, gf2, gf1's housemate, gf1's housemates 'gf' and youngest bro came over for a night of musicals and moscato (I am such a tragic I even made it a Facebook event). I thought it was really good of youngest bro to pass up on some overtime work to come along given that he also is not a big fan of the musical, so that was really nice.

I watched Footloose for the first time - can't say it was one I'll feel the urge to watch again.

We then conned everyone into watching Phantom of the Paradise - a film that was my mum's favorite of all time that she has the family hooked on as a bit of a cult classic:
I can highly recommend this as the best 70's horror comedy musical thriller love story there is!

We also watched RENT which was breaking point for youngest bro (my love of the musical and it's soundtrack is equal to the amount of pure hatred he feels for it) so he went home. In the end, gf1 and her housemate were the last to leave, with gf2 sleeping on the couch and sneaking out before I woke up on Saturday.

Saturday I went to my parents house and mumsy, dadsy, middle bro, youngest bro and I headed out to civic for some lunch and to see Death at a Funeral at Dendy. I'd give it about a 7/10 - it was generally pretty funny, with some really funny parts (not as funny as SuperBad, but probably more suitable for people like my parents!) but I have got to say: Why are the Dendy theatres so small?! We were in the second row from the front, having walked in 10 minutes before the start, and it was packed out!

After the movies we dropped dadsy and the boys at home and mumsy and I got our granny on and headed out to OfficeWorks and Pialligo.

Officeworks is always fun with mumsy - she's a big fan of stationary and the sort - and we had set out to get some paper to make invites for dadsy's 50th coming up next month (that he is officially in denial/anger/depression about). At first we were just going to buy some paper with a pretty border and print something off, but we ended up with two types of paper, some push pins, some stickers, some gold pens and silver and black envelopes. Dadsy's been called overseas for work for most of next week, so I'm going round to see mumsy on Saturday to help put together the invites and pretend I have an artistic bone somwhere in my body.

I also love Pialligo - I honestly think the main motivator for me for buying a home is to have a garden. I have NO green fingers and I have no idea about what should be grown where and how to grow it, but I just love to look at it all, plus I LOVE Peter from Gardening Australia - I could totally get into buying those gardening magazines!

We bought three beautiful pots for the paved area out the back - mumsy was looking for some small plain dark pots, but we ended up buying some largish round pots with a greeny-blue-brown drip down effect (if that makes sense). They were 50% off so only $60 each and a lady that passed us in the shop, the serving lady AND dadsy all commented on how nice they were, so it was definitely a good buy. I also managed to find my dream plant:

Flowering dogwood - look at the flowers!

After that I came home and did some coloring in (yes, I did) and started the sixth Harry Potter book. Today was spent catching up with some extended family, doing the groceries and sitting around on my ass.

It's weekends like these that make you realise how much you should appreciate having your partner around!

Dress me up!

So.

Please ignore the fact I have man shoulders.

And bulky arms.

And some side boobage.

Because from Monday I'm back to work on shifting a few kg (I found two of the six I lost) as there is a lowish back on this and I don't have the toight back I used to. I'm also tired of feeeling icky again after two weeks 'off'.

I'm wearing this dress to an outdoor wedding in the Blue Mountains on the first weekend of November - the reception is indoors:

Can anyone suggest shoes/bag/accessories?

Also - please don't bag out my dress! I don't LOVE love it, but I like it.

(ps - the speech went pretty terribly - I almost stopped halfway through and just walked out. Yeah, that bad. Ah well - water under the bridge eeh tee see!)

Get your style ready

I'm starting a presentation I have to give tomorrow on Indonesia's Industrial Relations system, so I'm just giving you warning that within 24 hours there'll be a picture of a dress I'm wearing to a wedding at the start of November and I wanted some shoe/bag/hair/accessories ideas.\

Thinking hats on, team!