Chook's Day

I was planning to wait until I had access to some of the photos, but I have no idea how long that is going to take!

So - the much discussed hens day!

I'd only been to one before - a wholesome dinner with lotsa family and some school friends, sitting around four seperate tables, answering questions on a form about the girl and her partner, their relationship, their stories etc - if you got a few answers right you got to peel a piece of cutout paper off a piece of paper shaped like a gingerbread man. Then we went home.

This one was a little different. We met out the front of the racecourse at 12 - I offered The Hun to pick up girlA (I've FINALLY given a name to one of my old housemates!) because I didn't want to arrive alone - but also so she could drink! There was about 12 of us in the group - The Hen, myself, girlA, boyA (another old housemate)'s gf (who was organising it), The Huns ex, Mrs Batman, W (who I think I am yet to mention but had a great time with so should give her a nickname), MrL (who I went to primary school with and is really lovely and also just broke up with his bf of five years *frown*) and some of the brides sisters and other friends.

We were set up in a marquee by the track, sharing with another hens party of women in their 40s with a hippy theme, a group of bucks and a group that might have been two groups of other hens (I think their theme was blue ribbons on their wrists - we had red and black garters on our wrists as well as some tiaras). There was also a quadranted off section where I THINK they had a 21st and a stripper - there was a lot of whooping and squealing etc and we weren't allowed to pull down the tarp to see what was going on.

The ticket price included unlimited grog for the five hours, so people were straight into the champagne and OJ - boyA's gf had mentioned they were gonna try and get some cruisers in there for me but it looked like a no go, but once I saw ppl with OJ in their champagne, I thought 'oh! I can drink that!' forgetting until the car trip home that the reason I couldn't drink it was due to the potential milk-filtering rather than the terrible taste. IDIOT. BAD VEGAN.

boyA's gf handed out a pack of cards with nickname things on it - Mr Mullet, Mr Loves his Body, Mrs Dances like a Stripper etc - and then you had to find someone like that in the crowd, show one of the 'judges' (boyA's gf and MrL) and then give the judge your card - once you got rid of your four cards you got to take a layer off the 'pass the parcel' (each layer with naughty things inside) - once I got one of the people in the group to dance like a stripper for me I won myself a pack of novelty condoms (four different sizes, one of which ended up on the Hens head with her eyelid turned inside out...)

There was also a list that you shared between two ppl (W and I) where you got points for completing tasks on the list - such as getting a picture with a jockey, get a photo of a guys undies, getting a guy to show you his tattoo, three legit numbers etc... Can you see where this is going...? As the day wore on and the alchohol flowed..?

Now this is where I'd just like to get on my lil soapbox for a moment.

{Deleted by the Author - sorry dudes!}

By 5, there was a LOT of ass grabbing going on, the beginnings of people hooking up, lots of D&M's, lots of dancing and lots of slurring.

And this is where I'd like to give a shoutout to the boy man who thought he should come and talk to us, but then proceeded to carry on about how he was only 22 (he looked 28), was in trading for banks (or some nonsense) whinged about how his old job made him go to vegas every second week, his new car cost him 220 thou (he wouldn't buy my 200 as it wasn't black), he had to pay for all his friends to come down and how he wanted Monday off but that would $1200 he'd never be able to get back. Please plan a better pick up conversation because it REALLY wasn't working... tho may have worked a lil later on one of the group.

As I was leaving, the group were celebrating the fact that the place was open until 7pm, then they were planning to head off into town - I last heard from boyA that they were still out dancing at 11pm.

{Deleted by the Author - sorry dudes!}

The lunch? They forgot to cater for the veg*ns, so brought out seven veggie skewers half an hour after everyone else finished. Four pieces of veggie on a skewer, plus we could have some of the green salad (drenched in balsamic). That was it. Also not condusive to drinking ;o)

The shoes? Lovely BUT A SIZE TOO BIG!! I'd love to know how they got smaller between trying them on and actually wearing them... tho I WILL admit that MAYBE I only tried on one in the store (I was in a hurry!) but lesson learnt (sorry D'jen!).

The dress? Also a success - v race suitable and the puppies were looking good (I got 'snaps' from some in the party) BUT the fact that the hollywood tape was a little precarious before I was even in the car shoud have been a warning for me - eg, nipplegate whilst putting on my shoes BEFORE EVEN LEAVING THE HOUSE! I tried to resist the urge to fiddle, but couldn't help myself - this was one of the closing conversations with MrL:

"The puppies are looking great but you need to stop fiddling with your dress!"
"What?"
"You've been fiddling all day with it - haven't you heard of that hollywood tape?"
"I HAVE got it - that's why I'm fiddling with it - I keep getting looks from people when they see the sticky glue on my chest"
"It's not the glue they're looking at!"

and so on.

My procrastination time is almost up - I'll post some pics of the day when/if I get them.

But now I'm off to get ready to start greeting seniors for our Dan Camp - I have to be on the other side of town by 7am for the rest of the week - my shoulders and neck are burning already!

WISH ME LUCK!