Thursday, January 05, 2006

I'm just not cricket

Well, I'm just not AT cricket, although I have been watching it on the telly.

But I'll start at the beginning and then can rest in the knowledge that I've wrapped up the holiday experience and need never speak of it again!

The Pen family holiday started out as you would expect - only four of the eight of us made it through the metal detector the first time, and there was a lot of holdup as little Canberra airport was punished by the great gonky lot of us needing to go through the detector again and again and again. Then I cut my thumb knuckle on the toilet paper dispenser. This was not boding well.

The flight was ok - I managed to numb out the turbulance by turning up the volume on Lumines (Yesssss! I was a good girl this year!!!!) although it wasn't that pleasent being cramped up next to middle brother whose propensity to sweat bucket loads whilst being cold and clammy yet inflicting terrible heat on others never fails to amaze me. Luckily he got moved to the 'emergency door' row for a lil more breathing room, but not that luckily in case of emergency as it was his first plane trip and had no idea what type of burden he was carrying.

We were meant to be staying at the resort the whole time, but in what was soon to become typical behaviour of the place as a whole, they stuffed up the bookings and we got to spend three days in Brisbane first. Brisbane is freaking hot. The air is thick and wet yet super hot, dry and buring at the same time. Fortunately, we were booked in the Rendezvous:

Freakin awesome. We had two apartments booked and each apartment had two seperate areas in it - luck of the Enny meant that The Hun and I got the half of our allocated apartment (with eldest brother and his gf) with the queen bed, lcd screen, kitchen, loungeroom etc etc. Dinner at the pub across the road was enlightening as once my mum had decided it was time for bed, she skulled my brothers black lable cruiser (unprompted) - aghast looks of disgust soon turned to encouragement as she worked her way down. Don't say we don't have class! The night ended for The Hun and I shortly after as we headed back to watch The Batchelor, while my brothers and the gf headed into the valley and lived it up at The Beat before realising they were in a gay club and left halfway thru the floor show.

(Side Note - did anyone see the final of 5 days to Midnight?! I got hooked on episodes 2-4 but missed the final one and can't find a complete rundown!!!)

The next day we headed down to the museum where they had an exhibit on (dum dum DUM!) horror movies! There was a lot of King Kong stuff in there, and did you know that every horror movie that contains a scene with a monster carrying a lady can be linked back to a 1700's statue which depicted a monkey man carrying away dead lady that was destroyed due to outrage but then another was created where the lady seemed to like it and then it was the influence for all of horror for all of time?

We headed down to the river for a delightful photo op with youngest bro:
(Heh heh heh, Wang Nasty)

and then headed for slushies where I managed to snap the motley crue in what was to become typical it's-too-hot-to-freakin-do-anything pose styles:

(L-R: Middle Bro, The Hun, the gf, Eldest Bro, Youngest Bro, Dadsy and Mumsy)

The rest of the day was spent sweating around the city, the night was spent at a restaraunt and the next day was spent on a car trip to Crapalbyn Kooralbyn. We were booked into two cabins - one of which didn't have airconditioning and the other of which would not be available for another two hours.

The rest of the trip is a bit of a blur - there was a lof of cars, uno, drinking, lumines, napping, drinking, putt-putt and eating. We visited a Crepe shop where they made one dish, pottered back to the kitchen, made the next dish so on and so one for eight meals, then charged to $15 for the pleasure of two dingy not-even-snack-sized crepes. We visited my uncles house that is considently five degrees warmer than Brisbane and has no air-con so that my mum almost passes out, but I believe we drove past here which was a little bit of blogger excitement for yours truly (tho I couldn't be completely mistaken as my memory and geography are poor and my tendency to misimagine things are high)! We also were haunted by a 'house monster' - a strange barking noise that was untrackable until eldest brother went to the bathroom after middle brother and was disgusted then pleasantly suprised and then disgusted again:

(It's a frog, not a turd)

The wedding was held outside in such heat that there were sweats dripping down our legs (not just mine, I checked) and for me - tissue bits under my arms after attempting to partake in damage control. It was lovely and short and it wasn't long before we were up at the reception area - there were rumours of a bar tab over the 140 guests and further investigation unveiled that this ran out before two hours was up BUT it was very generous of them to continue to pay up until midnight, at which time we left.

I won't go into how frustrated I got, or how I discovered my limit to my patience and tolerance, or just how sick I can get of my family, extended family and being squooshed in next to my middle brother who got the flu and continued his trend of sweating bucket loads whilst being cold and clammy and inflicting terrible heat on me whilst also getting a cold and sneezing everywhere for what was more than 6 hours of car time.

I will sum it up with a delightful snap taken outside of the real estate office:

The Kooralbyn Reality was looking pretty grim.
(NB - eldest bro doesn' have star tats - it's jus not cricket to show his nips on the net.)

Oh yeah! The reason we arne't at the cricket is coz The Hun got a cold from all the sneeze juice flying around.

Good times, good times.


Erica said...

Hahaha - sounds like your typically dysfunctional family holiday.

And is there a reason why in one of those photos almost everyone is holding their crotch? Or was that just the thing to do in QLD.

Erica said...

On "biggening" that photo I see they aren't holding their crotches. It just looks like that in the small version.

Enny said...

Heh heh - I didn't even notice!!

I guess it's jus the way they all sit!

Erica said...

You belong to a family of crotch holders :P