Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Oh hai!

Still heres.

Flirted with the idea of creating a whole new identity but would be too lonely - also thought about suspended animation (is that what it's called? where you life pauses?) but you can see I obviously don't know enough about it. Also - changed my mind on that for a little while.

Wish there was something exciting to give you guys, but seemingly not - I've just had some more raisin toast (you guys HAVE to try that extra thick cafe style from the bread aisle) and am about to go to cardio-boxing class then clean up the house because we have a stinking house inspection on Friday.

I guess my yoyoing still continues - I kinda feel like that wire that our neighbours used to tie between their fruit trees. It was tense but relaxed, and as soon as a bird landed on it it would vibrate like nothing else. Not that I have birds landing on me, but you know what I mean. Surely you do?

I worry about not having friends, then feel happy to have so many lovely friends; I feel secure in my relationship, then I freak out and look to poke holes and doubt; I am happy with how I look and feel then I freak out and then I binge.

I guess it's just a clashing of the times - The Hun's ex is engaged, had lunch with a friend with a baby, went to the markets with a newly pregnant friend and her son, getting ready for another two weddings later this year, a pregnant friend is visiting from interstate, people are buying houses, I'm getting older, I lost The Hun to Le'frickin'Tour and then Harry Potter, I'm begging Tony Ferguson to hurry up getting his soy shakes to a shopfront near me, Dadsy wants to put Elvis down...

You can imagine how fun I am.

Anyways, must be looking on the bright side - going to Melbourne next month, going to see Angus & Julia Stone soon, and planning to go to BDO and Homeback too.

Off the gym - will perhaps return with something more enlightening later :o)

7 comments:

Jen said...

Dude, I so hear you. I don't know how to fix it , or have any advice, but I get how you feel.

I find wine helps me...no, really...

(It's not like I need it to start my day, so I'm not quite an alcoholic though)

Maybe you just need to shake things up a bit, go do something a bit silly.

Ben said...

I am sitting on a computer in the middle of the afternoon in Munich, feeling well but still covered in spots, waiting fifteen more days until Singapore Airlines will fly me to Melbourne.

And until then, I have just my own company with which to ponder the various contingencies of my life and the lives of others.

Believe me, I know exactly, exactly, how you feel.

m. said...

fact: melbourne is always three degrees colder than the mean temperature for that particular month when i am not in residence.

also: thanks for making me join suckbook. i feel dirty.

AND thanks for those books! i can't beleive you thought i was going to thailand like two days after you sent me your japanese guidebooks :P

Enny said...

d'jen - I was partaking in the same habit, however more of the cruiser persuasion!

ben - Oh, man. Your trot sounds a lot rougher than mine - I should learn to be grateful for what I do have, huh? :o)

m - Damn! You're Welcome! Damn!(I get confused - the two holidays were so close together - I'm glad I sent you the right ones though!!!).

Enny said...

m - no wait! I got you mixed up with another 'm' who is off to Thailand!!!

Ben said...

Actually, I really shouldn't complain. I've got so much to come home to. Until then, there's an amazing, stunning girl in Melbourne who sits by the phone listening to all my complaints, and there are always trains ready to take me to faraway places. Like Brussels on Friday. Hoorah!

Although you didn't get chickenpox while travelling alone in Vienna. I'm totally going to use that as my excuse for everything until I get home.

I still know exactly how you feel. It's natural to be uncertain, to question things around you - it shows that you care. But be aware of all of the good parts, and know that there's nothing bad that can't be fixed.

Enny said...

ben - that's more like it! Plus you now have the ultimate topper for 'I have a headache' or 'my finger hurts'! And thanks :o)