Sad Panda

I consider myself to be a funny type of people person. I get anxious around new people, becoming either dead quiet or totally overcompensating, The Hun says I'm different with my friends than I am with him, and I seem to spend a fair amount of time feeling that any problems that people are going through are also a burden I shoud carry and something I should fix.

The Hun is camping with friends at the moment (back tmr!) so I've spend a lil time pottering about by myself. I was at xhmM's house last night (he is camping so was watching movies with his gf and another friend) and had tried to book myself to spend today doing something too, so sent around an email to see if anyone was going to the 'nats this weekend - I've never been. Although I knew of five different people going, not one of them contacted me today to organise something (with the exception of youngest bro who messaged at an ungodly hour to say he wasn't going so I shouldn't wait for him - though I didn't hear it, I finally think I've managed to block out my message tone while sleeping!)

(You can also tell I'm home alone as I'm rambling)

So after getting out of bed mid-to-late morning and realising nobody loved me, I hopped on the scales as I have been doing all week. My weight has gone up 800g since Monday. In fact, it has been going up all week (with the exception of a few 100g loss on Day 2). So I moped about this a bit and decided to eat half a bag of rice crackers and mope. This didn't help. Then I decided to try on my two cocktail dresses - neither of them do up. This also didn't help. So I decided to run some washing. Needless to say that was NO help.

So I decided to take up Jey's advice and head out the Belconnen markets.

And the store was lovely.

And this is what I bought:

(Mozzarella!)

Cheese!! Thanks Jey!! I tell you, this stuff is so good grilled on toast that I may or may not have almost finished it all already... the expiry is the 12th, so I figure it's gotta go soon anyways... This would also be a good place to tell you how I was preheating the griller and then found out 10 minutes later I had been heating the oven, not the grill... but it's not really that much of a story and proddly not really worth a mention.

(Miso).

Do you know how many different types of this stuff there are?! It was all very stressful - a recipe I have saved up requires 1tsp of Miso, but that's all it says! Hopefully it works out okay...

(Deodorant)

Because vegan deoderant is hard to find. Well, effective and nice smelling vegan deoderant has thus far been hard to find - this will be my fourth attempt in just over 7 months, what with the tea tree one (too strong smelling), the Lush bar (it hurts to rub on) and the salt water (ineffective and drips).

(Soy Ice 'cream')

How could I not! I was a mopey girl home alone for the weekend and there's something quite cathartic about eating icecream out of a tub for dinner. And while I feel quite full, I don't regret it. Yet.

(Cellulite Cream. Ugh)

Let's not skirt around this, hey? It's hardly 'Life is beautiful' in my pants. And it needs to be fixed. And no, you don't need to tell me that cheese and ice cream aren't going to help because I know that, which is why I bought the next product:

Detox! Although technically, the product I bought next was actually this:

And I didn't realise I'd bought the wrong one until I was home and I was going to traipse all the way back across Canberra to return it, so I stopped past three seperate smaller shops before I went to Tuggeranong to buy the one I actually wanted - middle bro said he'd buy it off me - Hooray!

So yeah, tmr I kick off a bit of a detox - having been inspired by Deb, methinks! I'm ready to go to the gym tmr and I'm feeling motivated - I have to strike the balance between healthy and quantity (mebbe TOO many beans this week?!) and I'll taking DOWN the chart I have on the wall and chart myself by how I fit into the cocktail dresses until the bridesmaids dress comes in.

I've stopped concentrating now coz Clueless is on - Enny out!