EnnyPen 101 - Week 5

First things first - everyone give props to The Student who I am blatantly ripping off by uni-posting.

Now, take a seat and tell me WHO THE F()CK MOVED THE POST OFFICE AT UNI!?!?!

*clears throat*

Let me try that again, from a slightly different angle.

Have you ever heard a uni student complain that they can't pay their uni fees?

"These damn uni fees, I just can't pay them!"

Like that? Yeah? I know how they feel. I just can't pay my damn uni fees.

(Get ready for the punchline....!)

It's not that I can't afford them, that I don't have enough money, that I'm gonna hafta start turning trixx for income. The fuckers simply won't let me hand over the cash!!! I want to pay!!! I'm all like, hey uni, here, take it biatch, take it!!! But they won't.

Rundown: I got my acceptance like two days before it was due in. I drove my ass from Tuggers to Belco to hand in my forms. Ticked, checked, approved and filed, I was told to expect my invoice in the mail halfway thru the next month. My attention was drawn to the fact that last semester, many people didn't get their mail on time and ended up being discharged from their courses as they hadn't paid the bills that hadn't yet arrived. So the guy told me to call after a few weeks to check up on it all.

I'm a good girl. I do what I'm told. So I called and was told 'it's on it's way'.

It wasn't, so I called again the next week and was told 'it's on it's way'.

You can see where this is going?

I did this a few times, weekly or so.

FF'ward to last Monday, where a call to the helpdesk gives me: "I can see here on my screen that it was posted to you on Friday and should be there tmr".

Thursday - still with no bill, I call and she get: 'Oh! You haven't filled out ur ra-ra-ra form. It must be done by tomorrow or you are expelled'.

So. I leave work at 3 and speed to Belco.

Enny: *breathless* I need to fill out the form so I don't get expelled
Snooty-yet-friendly-and-quirky-office-girl-gimp: What form?
(explanation ensures)
Snooty-yet-friendly-and-quirky-office-girl-gimp: It looks like you already have.
Enny: double-yew tee eff!!
Snooty-yet-friendly-and-quirky-office-girl-gimp: Oh no, yeah, you need to fill it out. Please tell me you have ur tax file number
Enny: double-yew tee eff!! SHE TOLD ME I DIDN'T NEED IT!!
Snooty-yet-friendly-and-quirky-office-girl-gimp: Oh. Do you want to pay upfront?
Enny: YES!! I JUST WANT SOMEONE TO TAKE MY FRICKIN MONEY!!!

So, I filled it out. And was told the bill would be printed last Friday night so I could pay.

That night (thurs) I get a call from my Dad to say that the uni sent a letter to say I need to fill out that form to avoid getting kicked out (nice one, dumbf()cks, a little late, don't you think??!!).

Friday I get a call from my Dad to tell me that my bill has already arrived.

How? I ask. It doesn't get printed until tonight?!

So I brought it in today and asked the guy WTF it was meant to mean.

"Oh, it's wrong. We'll print a new one on Friday, it will get to you next Tuesday. But you need to pay the $135 services fee"

So, after walking into what used to the Post Office (now a computer store) and stumbling around like a derro looking for it (it's moved to the general store) I get to the lovely old man that I recognise from when I used to study here.

I would like to pay my General Services Fee, please.

It says here you've already paid it.

WTF?FFS?!!!

I haven't paid it. These bloodsucking money merchants seem to be vehemently opposed to bloodsucking my money!!

There's already a late fee (it was due before my bill was issued) so I'm keeping mum on this one.

Shhh.

Stay tuned till nex week when you find out if i get to give someone like a grand of my money that I could use at the DFO in Melbourne in a fortnight or if I end up mailing it to my fav bloggers (that'll keep you comin back for more!!).

Apologies for the gruffness and pirate-mouth in this post - {Deleted by the Author - sorry dudes!}

*SIGH*